**For those of you who don't usually follow my blogs (here or at MySpace) I tend to title them with a song title or lyrics. =)
Only two days left of 2009 and I can't tell you how glad I am to see it finally end!! It's been such a crappy year altogether! I won't even go into all the horrible things 2009 tossed at us because I try to never dwell on the past, it happened, it's so yesterday, and now you can look at it as a learning experience and move on. Suffice it to say, we survived intact.
Okay, to be honest, a lot of the personal crappiness of 2009 is partly my fault. I let the fact that I haven't had an agent since July 2007 get to me. But, how could I not? I mean, finding an agent (twice) was validation that yeah, I can have a career as a writer, but, unfortunately, that agent didn't deem me worthy enough to stick with me through the ups and downs. She didn't fight hard enough to get my work to an editor and she didn't believe in me enough to know I could give her more work to sell. Initially, when she dumped me, I was pissed off, then depressed, then determined. I sold my novella, the one an editor (now at Simon & Schuster) requested I write and I returned to work on my third novel. Of course my momentum died when 2008 ended and I still didn't have another sale or agent and my e-books sales were practically obsolete.
So, I spent 2009 in a funk...not really writing, getting more and more depressed that, although I was getting requests for fulls on my first book Forget Me Not and I got awesome feedback on my second book Dark Obsession from the amazing author Lauren Baratz-Logstead who totally loved my book (she even did the copy edits) I wasn't getting any offers. The eighteen months of rejections totally killed my spirit and I let the depression fester for so long I completely lost sight of the pot of gold that is writing. I let down my family, my friends and my (limited amount of) fans. And, I'm sorry.
Now I'm not normally one to make a New Years resolution because....I don't know why, I just don't. But this year I'm going to give it a try. So, here goes:
- On December 31st I'm going to flush 2009 down the drain, clear my mind of the self-doubt that became my prison and I promise to sit butt in chair and write--non-stop---for two hours a day!
- I will complete not one but two novels this year.
- I will find an agent and an editor by the end of June!!
- I will market myself better than I have been by posting a blog daily---be forewarned, they could be dull and rambly. =)I might add more as the days go by, but for now, there ya go.
So, Goodbye and Good Riddance 2009.
So, what are your resolutions for the new year?